Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Harry and the bauble

Well, after having tempted fate by saying that Harry wasn't interested in the baubles I made the fatal mistake of feeding him his Kong (rubber toy, hole in the middle, people stuff them with food to keep their dogs amused) with white bread and marmite, forgetting that wheat makes Harry hyper. Cerrr-lang!!!

After wearing out the carpet doing laps for a while he turned his attention to the Christmas tree and the bauble he had been happily bouncing for the last few days obviously looked very tasty. I had deliberately left just the plastic balls at the bottom of the tree (just in case) and it was lucky I did! The little goit grabbed a bauble and ran, dodging my rugby tackle in the process.

Luckily he didn’t have very far to run and we cornered him in the kitchen but by this time the bauble was well and truly wedged in the back of his mouth. Discussing options, we stuck him on his lead so he couldn't go anywhere and there he stood with the single most belligerent look I have ever seen an animal give. Stemming a rising tide of hysteria at a fast disappearing bauble, I grabbed a treat, Keith grabbed a piece of wood, (both usually dead certs for him dropping whatever he shouldn't have) and waved them fruitlessly under his nose. Daft bagle was actually drooling so much that there was a pool forming under his head and he STILL wouldn't give the bauble up.

I tried to prise his jaws but they were already so far open that I couldn't get the gap I needed to get to the bauble and all the time it's moving further and further back in his mouth. Eventually I decided the only option left to us was to be as stubborn as Harry, and we went back to the sofa while he stayed in the kitchen weighing his options. He dropped the bauble eventually, snaffled the treat and was giving the piece of firewood a good lick when Keith decided to try and ambush him to get the bauble back.

Now, I’m being generous when I say that while Keith may be built like a gazelle, but he certainly doesn't move like one and by the time he reached the kitchen, Harry had clocked him and grabbed the bauble again. Keith was not impressed

The next few minutes were pure Benny Hill. Both hound and man came running into the lounge and proceeded to play chase around the coffee table. Harry then decided he was REALLY unhappy with the situation so started trying to bark at us (me by association for having the cheek to sit on the sofa and laugh I think).

I say try because his entire gob was filled with bauble so it came out more like "uffff" than a proper Harry bark. Keith and I were on the floor with tears running down our cheeks and Harry, taking umbrage to this, started 'barking' even more, which (obviously) just had us crying even harder.

Eventually though Keith lost his patience and took Harry for a walk. I don't know what he did on that walk but eventually the two of them came back, Harry looking very crestfallen and a very unimpressed Keith holding the mangled remains of what was once a bauble.

That should have been the end of the story, but like so many things where Harry is concerned, ‘should’ doesn’t mean diddly. I would like to say that our guests will be able to gaze on our luscious tree come Christmas Day, but I’m not at all certain they won’t be faced with a woeful twig adorned with misshapen blobs. Simple fact is that Harry like digging and chewing ... or sometimes chewing and digging, he’s not fussy ... and his new favourite location for both these activities is (you guessed it) behind the Christmas tree.

For a dog of his size to fit into the corner behind the tree is a blatant thumbing of the nose to the laws of physics, but he can, and he does. Expect more updates over the next few weeks with photos of an ever decreasing tree ... or possibly an ever increasing Harry, it’s anybody’s guess at the moment.

Oh and finally, a big Hello and Merry Christmas to Pascalle, the sender of our first Christmas card (and shame on you people, it came all the way from the US!!). Harry would like to thank you for the compliment and wanted to send you a photo of just how cute he was. Unfortunately as you can see posing was too much effort for the little fella.

Actually, I’ve just remembered, house news!! (I’d nearly forgotten the point of the blog there!! lol) The kitchen is STILL not finished. Not news in the purest form I grant you but what is impressive is that it has actually taken a step backwards!!!

The dishwasher broke after a heady 2 months of use and we are now back at the mercy of MFI ordering systems to get a new one. I have the delivery pencilled in for around 2012.

In addition, the plate rack is still languishing in the barn because our kitchen fitter has stubbornly refused to answer his phone for the last month. Best of all though, my complaint to MFI corporate headquarters was answered by a lovely lady a few weeks ago. Apparently the entire kitchen based SNAFU is my fault because I missed the initial delivery that they didn’t tell me about.

So that was nice to know.

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